Thursday, April 20, 2006

An ancient rant about me...

This was actually reposted from my original blog in 2001. So adjust the calendar of events by about 5 years whenever applicable.

"So I was thinking the other night, not that it happens very often but when I do, these random blurbs just fire out of my brain.
Anyway... I also wanted to self loath myself in this chapter a little bit. Not that I find much wrong about me now, except for the 10# of overweightness I have and the too little of an income, I quite like myself. I quite hate the foolish, inept loser I used to be. Let me spin you a little story about an 17 year old College boy Freshman ... :
Pan in -- A young man in all black, except his socks.
Biker style motorcycle jacket
black jeans
black Ozzy t shirt
black Converse sneakers
white socks
Jeans, just a littttle too short.
Long greasy hair that if unbrushed falls into his eyes and further down. Hair so dense that it's nearly 3'' thick all around and 6 - 7'' long at least, on top.
In walks a stunning Puerto Rican girl, dark brown hair (long) in a brown sweater and black pants with conservative brown boots. She recognizes the "mess" of a man-boy standing outside the Union, smoking lazily.
"Jay.... ?" Puzzled look. "Jay (insert last name here)?"
"Terry?? Wow... yeah, it is me.."
Girl Terry looks him over, if somewhat dissaproving, shows no notice and hugs him tightly. She says she is busy with class, but would love to have breakfast in the morning at the Union.
Man-boy agrees.
Terry shows up in an equally as lovely and flattering outfit, she looks very beautiful. A solid 8.5 out of 10.
Jay shows up in the same clothes from the day before, but he took a shower and brushed the hair up on top of his head.
They eat, they talk about the past... They have fun.
Then she does something completely unreal to the man-boy, she asks him to meet her at a party later on that night.
Jay agrees and like a fucking dope, goes to the Jock Party, on the other side of campus.
A friggin fuckin Jock party. All Football and Lacrosse players. The total antithesis to this young man all adorned in black, with the white socks. But he walked in anyway.
At first, surprisingly... no one noticed him. He walked around, the only one in a biker jacket. The only one not in a college frat sweatshirt. the only one, singular. He saw Terry.
"Wow." Jay thought, he could have no other thought. Banish that 8.5 out of 10 from the record. At that moment, she was a 10. Decked out, made up, she looked like a friggin Angel, like an Angel that just stepped out of the Heavens.
She saw him... said hello, now, obviously dissapointed in the idiot boy. I guess she thought that he only dressed like an outcast slob for class, that he would magically take a shower, shave, put on nice clean clothes, nice clothes, maybe some nice shoes... something, anything, but no. He saw the mix of pity and sadness in her eyes. She didn't talk that much more to him that night, every so often she would check in with him, then go talk to her friends. A drunk jock mistook Jay for one of his friend's brothers and kept getting him beer. The kid had 5, then escaped the jock. He asked Terry if he could call her...
She said sure and even gave him the right phone number.
He never called more than once.
That was 9 years ago. I look at it now and laugh my ass off. Chalk it up to inexperience. I was about 4 years behind my peers socially. In almost every way. It was so sad"


I don't know why I reposted this other than to give some of you that know me a few laughs and to self-flaggelate a little more. :)

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

These are the moments that make us who we are today ;o) Long live the awkward moments!

April 23, 2006 7:12 AM  
Blogger MacFurious said...

Yeah, and maybe if someone had headed me off at the pass that night before I went to the party, I would have turned out differently. Of course, we can play the "what if" game all night. I just find it so amusing how completely clueless I was a decade ago or so.

April 27, 2006 8:26 PM  

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